A Helper Corresponding to Him

“And the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.’” – Genesis 2:18

(יח) וַיֹּ֙אמֶר֙ יְהֹוָ֣ה אֱלֹהִ֔ים לֹא־ט֛וֹב הֱי֥וֹת הָֽאָדָ֖ם לְבַדּ֑וֹ אֶֽעֱשֶׂה־לּ֥וֹ עֵ֖זֶר כְּנֶגְדּֽוֹ׃

The literal Hebrew translation of ‘a helper comparable to him’ is made up of two words: ezer, which means ‘help,’ and k’negdo, which means ‘suitable’ or ‘corresponding to.’ The word, ezer, conveys strength and the ability to rescue others, rather than a subordinate role. The phrase k’negdo literally means ‘according to the opposite of him.’” – Joshua Rodriguez

“God often describes Himself with the word, ‘ezer.’ See Psalm 33:20; Psalm 70:5; and Psalm 115:9.” – John Piper

In Hebrew, “whenever one confronts someone of equal power, moral and ethical weight, such a confrontation is termed נגד (neged). It is a head-on collision of will. When the two parties disagreeing are not of equal power, or moral/ethical weight, the confrontation is termed as one being עולה [‘ascending (above)’] or יורד [‘descending (below)’], one of the adversaries either prevailing or losing in such an encounter.” – Joshua Rodriguez

“If he is unworthy she shall be opposed to him, to fight him (Yevamot 63a).”

“Humanity needs a partner and opponent. We need help in confronting ourselves if we hope to learn and become all that we have the potential to know and be. The Hebrew words, עזר כנגדו do not explicitly say ‘woman’ in any direct sense. It says, “a help that is equal to and across from him.” And the word ‘adam’ is not, per se, a proper name, but rather generally refers to humanity. Thus, we might render the passage in question as follows: ‘It is not good for humans to be alone. I (God) will configure humanity such that individuals might find help in another that suits them, that meets them where they are, that stands in opposition to them on equal footing to reign each other in, to teach each other, to question each other, to care for each other, that they might not lose themselves in their own delusions and imaginations, nor face themselves alone without the caring assistance of a friend and devoted partner.’” – Joshua Rodriguez

“By extension, we might also argue that God intended us to have peers in general to stand with and against us in love. The real meat of this principle is not that we would have a help that simply stands with us (עזר איתו = a help WITH him), but rather the contradiction or paradox of a help AGAINST us. Thus, by implication, Torah does not suggest that true loyalty is to never question or confront, but rather that the loyalty that God intended from the beginning was to assist and support each other through opposition, questioning and providing limits. We are to be a ‘help AGAINST each other.’” – Joshua Rodriguez

“At work and in school, the most productive relationships are between those who question us in kindness, who point out our errors, weaknesses or flaws, and then help us overcome them. Our most helpful relationships are with people that we can bounce ideas off of, tell them what we are thinking and get critical feedback in return, reflecting back to us what we didn't know we were saying or filling in gaps we might have overlooked.” – Joshua Rodriguez

“Spouses and siblings, friends and fellows in our community and places of worship best serve and help us when they NOT ONLY rally around us and cheer us on, but when, as needed, they question us or call us out and stand against us in love to support us, to provide checks and balances; when they stand in solidarity with our overarching goals and aspirations and ideals so much that they help channel us back into line when we are off base. They comfort us when we are discouraged, and they make us uncomfortable when we become complacent or self-absorbed. They both help us realize our dreams and bring us back to reality when we start to go adrift in our delusions. And they listen when we argue for why we are right and accommodate the things THEY hadn’t seen or thought of.” – Joshua Rodriguez

“Incidentally, the same principle is the active mechanism that shapes civil society through democracy, checks and balances, legislative and community debate, and political parties who (should) rally together for the good of one another, even as they function as a backstop for the excesses of their counterparts.” – Joshua Rodriguez

“Clearly, the principle of ‘helping against’ someone is a balancing act. Too much help and not enough against becomes permissive and enabling. Too much against and not enough help can become toxic, hurtful, humiliating, rancorous, bitter. Not all conflict is helpful. Not all solidarity is helpful. The truth of the paradox is found in the balance between support and opposition. There is probably no formula that dictates when the relationship needs more support and less opposition or vice versa. The wisdom is found in knowing that we can and should dynamically apply both to our relationships to bring them into balance when they start to run amok.” – Joshua Rodriguez

“I’m my own best friend when I can both comfort and confront myself.” – Joshua Rodriguez

Explaining “the curse” of a woman’s desire being towards her husband.

“To the woman He said: ‘I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception; in pain you shall bring forth children; Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.’” Genesis 3:16

“Scholars have offered various interpretations of this subtle Hebrew phrasing. Most interpret this to mean that the woman would desire to be in control of her husband, but he would be the master. Others see this as implying that the woman’s desire for her husband would be frustrated by his role as an authority in her life.” – Bibleref.com

“Male headship in the marriage relationship is not part of the curse and this idea is not implied here. On the contrary, God’s response to this incident proves that Adam’s role as leader and protector was intended before sin entered the world. The New Testament makes clear that God’s design for human marriage, with husband as the self-sacrificing head, is meant to be a beautiful picture of Christ and the church.” See Ephesians 5:22–33 – Bibleref.com

“This curse involves conflict over the God-given marriage roles. Each spouse fails to live up to God’s design for selfless love and respect between husbands and wives.” – Bibleref.com

The prophets spoke of the relationship between God and His people as a marriage.

“As a young man marries a young woman, so will your Builder marry you; as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you.” Isaiah 62:5

“Return, O backsliding children, says the Lord; for I am married to you. I will take you, one from a city and two from a family, and I will bring you to Zion.” Jeremiah 3:14

“You are an adulterous wife, who takes strangers instead of her husband.” Ezekiel 16:32

“I will betroth you to Me forever; yes, I will betroth you to Me in righteousness and justice, in lovingkindness and mercy; I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness, and you shall know the Lord.” Hosea 2:19-20

Marriage is symbolic of Christ and His Church.

Paul says of marriage in Ephesians 5:32, “This is a great mystery, and I take it to mean Christ and the church.”

“Human marriage is the earthly image of this divine plan. As God willed for Christ and the church to become one body (Galatians 3:28; 1 Corinthians 12:13), so He willed for marriage to reflect this pattern—that the husband and wife become one flesh. ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’” (Genesis 2:24) – Bibleref.com

Jesus Christ quoted Genesis 2:24 in Matthew 19:4–5, and thus, reiterated that marriage is a covenant between a man and a woman instituted by God. Jesus attended a wedding while on earth. See John 2.

“Geoffrey Bromiley is right when he says, “As God made man in His own image, so He made earthly marriage in the image of His own eternal marriage with His people” (God and Marriage, p. 43). The fall ruined the harmony of marriage because it twisted man’s loving headship into hostile domination in some men and lazy indifference in others. And it twisted woman’s intelligent, willing submission into manipulative obsequiousness in some women and brazen insubordination in others.” – John Piper

Bible verses that support the marriage covenant:

“When a man is newly married, he shall not go out with the army or be liable for any other public duty. He shall be free at home one year to be happy with his wife whom he has taken.” Deuteronomy 24:5

“He who finds a wife, finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.” Proverbs 18:22

“The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” 1 Corinthians 7:3-5

“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the Church, His body, of which He is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the Word, and to present her to Himself as a radiant Church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.” Ephesians 5:21-28

“Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.” Hebrews 13:4

Revelation 19:6–8 looks forward to a wonderful wedding day for those who belong to Jesus and become members of His Church.

For the full article by Joshua Rodriquez, please click on the following link: sefaria.org/sheets/333823.1?lang=bi&with=all&lang2=en

For the full article by John Piper, please click on the following link: desiringgod.org/articles/a-metaphor-of-christ-and-the-church

For the full article by Bibleref.com, please click on the following link: bibleref.com/Genesis/2/Genesis-2-18.html