In Scripture, God uses the concept of marriage to help us understand to help us understand how He wants to be with us, and us to be with Him. [2] So, in this blog I am using the marriage between Catherine and Caleb in the movie, “Fireproof” to write about a fireproof marriage with God and His people, the Church.
In the movie Fireproof, Caleb exploded at Catherine when she disagreed with him. When we don’t get our way, what is our natural response? Does anger honor God, spouse, or those around us? No, it tends to dishonor everyone including ourselves. So, we need Christ to change our anger into understanding and patience. Catherine hated Caleb’s angry outbursts. She wanted to love Caleb, but Caleb was being unlovable. Intimacy was broken.
Caleb and Catherine tended to speak poorly of each other. Does speaking poorly of people behind their back lead to good relations? NO. The Lord calls us to bless not curse one another. What kind of things do we say about people behind their backs? Are they positive or negative? God can change this about us. But we must confess our short-comings and ask God to change us.
Caleb’s friend Michael helped him to understand the importance of oneness in marriage using salt and pepper shakers. Two people may be as opposite as can be and yet complement each other perfectly. We need to see how people, unlike ourselves, may be just what we need to be a better person. For example, some people are contemplative, and others are outgoing. Some are frugal and others are extravagant. Some are risk-takers and others are cautious. The Bible says that there is a time and season for EVERYTHING under the sun. [3] If we have to be right all the time, we’re wrong. It’s okay to be wrong as long as we accept corrections.
After Caleb struggled to stop looking at pornography on the internet, he finally destroyed his computer. Jesus said if your eye causes you to stumble cut it out. What radical steps should you take to remove destructive behavior from your life? For sure, ask Jesus to change your appetite by the power of the Holy Spirit so that you no longer crave that which is destructive.
Even though Catherine was “done” with him, Caleb kept trying to win her back. How often do we let others make the first move towards reconciliation? Christ demonstrated His love for us by dying for us while we were still His enemies. [4] That is true love.
How can we change? The answer is the grace of God. God can make us by His grace what He is by nature. Be humble! God resists the proud but gives grace to the humble. [5]
Love needs to be demonstrated. Caleb sent Catherine flowers with a note attached. God demonstrated His love for us. What are practical things we can do to let others know we love them?
While caring for Catherine while she was sick, Caleb apologized to her for the poor husband he had been towards her. Have we done anything to someone? Do we need to ask them to forgive us? What keeps us from asking for forgiveness? What is the most important thing you believe God wants you to do—right now—to improve your relationship with God and those around you?
Jesus forgave those who crucified and mocked Him! He prayed for those who tortured, insulted, and hated Him. He said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” Even after Jesus prayed this prayer, those around Him kept on doing what they were doing. Nothing changed. The soldiers who Jesus forgave parted His raiment and cast lots for them. The rulers who were there continued to insult Jesus, saying, “He saved others; let Him save himself if He be Christ, the chosen of God.” [6]
Mother Teresa said, “People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway. If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway. If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway. What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway. The good you do today will often be forgotten. Do good anyway. Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway. In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”
God calls us treat one another as He treated us. Love requires the grace of God. Love requires the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit is the very essence of God. His essence is love. To love as Jesus loves, we have to be filled with the Holy Spirit.
It is hard to add something in a cup that is full. John the Baptist said, “I must decrease but He must increase.” [7] We can’t be filled with Jesus as long as we are still filled with self. To have a fireproof marriage with God, spouse, and people, we must have Jesus Christ fill us. Jesus went to Jerusalem on Palm Sunday not to be celebrated. It was so God could forgive us and fill us with His Holy Spirit.
Are you ready for fireproof marriage with God and others? If so, remember Romans 12:2, “Be not conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.” As you ask Jesus to transform you. He will take you to new heights, widths, depths, and breadths of the love of God.
[1] Romans 12:2
[2] Ephesians 5:25-30
[3] Ecclesiastes 3:1
[4] Romans 5:6-8
[5] Ephesians 2:8; 1 Peter 5:5
[6] Luke 23:33-35
[7] John 3:30
